Attatchments

“Most of our troubles are due to our passionate desire for and attachment to things that we misapprehend as enduring entities.” ~Dalai Lama

When I was a little girl, I had a deep attachment to a ragged yellow dog I affectionately named Mushy and a tattered yellow blanket I think I saved untilI I was married. Their constant place in my life gave me a sense of comfort. The mere possession of them was enough. In a world that’s noisy, quick and contradictory, ownership in things offer safety and control.

The problem is that the more things we are attached to, the more we worry about them. From the fear that the toaster is left on when you leave the house to the moths in the closet making holes in your favorite sweater, attachment to things come with a price. And that doesn’t go away as we mature.

My parents own a beautiful black car. They love driving it. Washing it. Admiring its shine. It’s speed. It’s digital display. They go to great lengths to park it in a spot away from all other cars and possible danger. We recently ate lunch together and luckily, my parents got a spot right outside the big restaurant windows allowing them to keep constant vigil of their beloved possession. Anyone in the vicinity of our table, if they were even remotely listening, would get continuous updates as to the status of the car, who parked behind or in front of the car, how close that driver came to endangering the car with their poor driving abilities and, as an added bonus, my parent’s opinion of that person based on their driving skills and the proximity of their car to that of my parent’s. Our relaxing lunch was in direct competition with their watchful eye. I couldn’t help but wonder if their attachment was all that healthy.

Seth Segall, in “Letting Go: What it means. How to do it.” explains that the Buddhist define attachment as a static and inflexible clinging. We can cling to things, relationships, ideas and expectations. When there is a rigidity in our attachments, or cravings, unhappiness often ensues. Segall describes cravings as “intense desires that are fixated on a particular object or experience. There is a tightness, rigidity, stereotypy, or “must-ness” about them—like the addict craving a fix; the overeater, a binge; the miser, more wealth. Satisfying a craving leads to transitory pleasure, but as the pleasure fades, more craving ensues. Cravings have a way of taking over our lives and enslaving us.”

So how do we let go of the worn stuffed animals, the shiny black cars, a package of cookies when we are lonely or the grand expectations that life should be a certain way? How do we acknowledge that setting fires in the kitchen, burning dinners, yelling at our children and serving potato salad out of plastic containers are all part of our imperfect adventure? We practice. We practice mindfulness, “we sit in meditation, practicing letting go. Breath by breath. Moment by moment. Again and again. We observe the places where we get caught, where we get stuck, the places where we get tight, the places where we separate ourselves from the moment with thoughts about how the moment ought to be. And we breathe. And we let go, loosen and unfold.”1

Adina Kelman
www.alifeinbalance.co
1 http://www.elephantjournal.com/2011/07/letting-go-what-it-means-how-to-do-it/

The Same Mistake Twice…Another Word on Making the Pancakes

Everyone was either occupied or out of the house. Now was my chance to do it again. I tiptoed into the kitchen, quietly pulled open the cabinet doors, and silently reached for the coconut flour. I don’t know if it’s because I have easily made over 19,760 pancakes (see 11/26 post) or my proportions have been off, but lately, my pancakes have not satisfied me the way they used to. I was ready to experiment with coconut flour again.

I had not done any new research prior to restarting, but that didn’t stop me. I thought that the pancakes that I envisioned in my head would somehow materialize on my plate. 1 cup coconut flour, 1 1/2 cups almond meal, 3 eggs, 2 tablespoons of the following: maca powder, cacao, vanilla, cinnamon, chia seeds, 1 cup almond milk. Start mixing. 1/2 cup more of almond milk. Stir. Another 1/2 a cup. The batter was like fluffy mud. I put some on the griddle to see if it would hold together. I thought that the third egg and extra 1/2 a cup of almond meal that I has used would do the trick. It didn’t. A 1/4 cup garbanzo bean flour and then another 1/4 cup later, the batter is still the consistency of grainy fluff that won’t stick together on the griddle. At this point I stop measuring and, instead of staying calm or admitting defeat, I just start throwing stuff in. Oats. A little better. More almond milk. Coconut flour soaks up liquid like a sponge. No difference. More oats. Finally, a little olive oil marginally salvaged what was left. With an insanely unhealthy amount of chocolate chips in the hope of masking the remaining disaster, I nonchalantly put the plate of pancakes on the table in front of all who had returned home or stopped what they were doing to gather around the table for brunch. “What’s this?”, my 11 year old asked. “Pancakes”, I snidely responded. “They look disgusting”. I ignored my family and as I watched them eat and listened to them complain, I hoped that the eggs didn’t contain salmonella because the burnt coconut flour pancakes did not seem to be thoroughly cooked through. I ate them to set an example and threw out the rest.

So what’s the secret to using coconut flour and why do I want to learn to bake with it so badly? Coconut flour is a healthy, high fiber, grain free alternative and a great source of manganese. High in lauric acid, coconut oil and flour, provide the body with ready energy. Studies show that coconut oil, high in the medium chain triglyceride, lauric acid, can be used directly for energy instead of being stored as fat. With some research showing medium chain triglyceride’s beneficial effect on cholesterol, coconut flour, is a beneficial supplement to a healthy diet.

And it mocks me as I try to learn to tame and master this beast of a flour. So maybe it’s a deep-seated need for control. Either way, I want to learn how to use it in my kitchen other than baking with it and throwing it out. In my typical, illogical fashion of doing things backwards, I started to research.

One site described coconut flour as “unforgiving”, requiring an inordinate amount of liquid and an unpredictable substitution ratio. Other sites attested to its tricky nature.
Ok, I was not alone. Feeling less inept, I continued to research. As usual, there was conflicting advice regarding the use and storage of coconut flour, but what I found in common across several sites is that 1. you can not substitute grain flour for coconut flour on a one to one ratio (a 1/4 to a 1/3 cup coconut flour for 1 cup grain-based flour is the general rule) and 2. any coconut flour recipe requires a lot, I mean a lot, of eggs (about 6 beaten eggs plus 1 cup liquid for every 1 cup of coconut flour). The other words of advice that I found posted across every site I read was basically not to experiment, but to instead follow well established recipes. Hmmmm. Maybe I should have read that first. I may make the same mistake twice, but I won’t make it a third time. Next weekend, I will turn toward trusted Paleo authority Mark Sisson of Mark’s Daily Apple and try what seems to be a basic coconut flour, user friendly, pancake recipe. Stay tuned. In the meantime, I would love any tips on baking with coconut flour. For those eager to test out this recipe before me, here it is:

Coconut Pancakes

Ingredients:
4 eggs
1/4 cup coconut flour
1/4 tsp vanilla extract
1 pinch nutmeg
1 pinch cinnamon
1 tablespoon honey
1/4 cup coconut milk (full fat)

Directions:
Mix these ingredients and let them sit for five minutes. Oil or grease up your pan and heat over medium heat. Pour about a 1/4 cup of batter for each crepe, allowing each side to brown before flipping it.

Until the next batch of pancakes!
Adina Kelman
Holistic Health Coach
www.alifeinbalance.co

Snow Days

The quickest way to tell a new mom from an older, more seasoned one is to gauge their reaction to the words “snow day”. If a no-school snow day instantly brings to mind craft projects, board games, snowmen and hot chocolate, then you are a new mother. If, however, the phone call that informs you that school will be closed due to inclement weather summons images of the 60 minute, sweat producing process of torturously bundling up just to be out for 15 minutes before someone has to pee or gets too cold to play because their older sister shoved a handful of snow down their jacket, then you’re a more experienced mom. Either way, you are going to have to feed them. Here are two easy, fun recipes to enjoy on those snowy days. This was the first time I made these with my kids and both recipes, based on our family’s tastes, need minor tweaking (see comments below). I don’t remember the original source of these recipes or where I even found them, but they’re fairly common and can be easily adjusted to suit your family’s personal tastes and preferences. Add a different nut or seed, experiment with rolled versus steel cut oats, change up the sweet and salty favors – have fun, experiment and make it your own.

Cacao Squares
Ingredients:
1/2 cup roasted unsalted cashews
3/4 cup shredded coconut (sweetened or unsweetened)
3/4 cup pitted dates
1 1/2 tablespoons raw cacao powder
1 tablespoon maple syrup (I used grade B)
1 tablespoon vanilla extract
1/4 teaspoon sea salt*
1 tablespoon hemp hearts (add to mix or save to sprinkle on top)

Directions:
Put all ingredients in blender. Line a pan with wax or parchment paper so there’s enough paper to cover the top of the mixture.
Transfer the blended mixture, which should be sticky, onto the lined pan, and flatten to distribute evenly.
Fold and press the top of the paper over the mixture and put in the fridge for an hour. Cut into any shape you desire and enjoy.

*Comments: My family agreed that the saltiness of this recipe needed to be adjusted down just a bit.

Oat Nut and Seed Bars
Ingredients:
3/4 cup rolled oats
1/2 cup oat flour (grind oats in blender if you don’t have flour)
4 tablespoons chocolate chips
2 tablespoons craisins (we chopped ours)
2 tablespoons chia seeds
1 tablespoon whole flax seeds
1 tablespoon sunflower seeds
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon nutmeg
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 to 2 mashed, ripe bananas*
2 tablespoons nut butter (we used creamy, organic peanut butter)
2 tablespoons sweetener* (we used coconut sugar)
1 teaspoon vanilla

Directions:
Preheat oven to 350
In medium bowl combine oats, oat flour, chocolate chips, craisins (you can use currants, raisins, cherries or any dried fruit) chia seeds, flax seeds, sunflower seeds, cinnamon, nutmeg and salt.
In a small bowl combine mashed banana, nut butter, sweetener and vanilla. Add to dry ingredients and mix well.
Spread out in a thin layer on oiled cookie sheet or baking dish.
Bake 22-24 minutes, until edges begin to brown. Cool completely before cutting into squares.

*Comments:
We used just one banana here for two reasons: we didn’t want a heavy banana taste and anyway, that’s all we had left in the house! We all agreed that for our personal tastes, the sweetness of this recipe needed to be adjusted up just a bit.

If you pair these tasty desserts with the traditional snowy day drink of hot chocolate, be sure that your cocoa mix is not made from hydrogenated oils. Whether you are a new or seasoned mom, enjoy those snowy days – they really do go by too fast.

To good health, lazy days and snuggling by the fireplace, Happy Snow Day!
Adina Kelman
www.alifeinbalance.co

Making Memories

It was winter break 2010 that I decided that staying home, playing cards and sipping hot cocoa by the fireplace wasn’t enough to constitute the lasting memories I envisioned my children fondly cherishing into adulthood. And so I decided to travel into NYC on the most heavily traveled, tourist saturated, gridlock day available…..after a massive snowstorm…..alone…..with four children. I’m not really sure what I was thinking, but I had a mission. I was out to create memories. And that I did.

It was not like I was holding these tickets for a long time. I specifically sent my mom and dad out earlier that day where they purchased half price tickets to Rock of Ages based on the advice of the guy standing next to them. He touted the play as hilarious and appropriate for all ages. I guess that’s why there are so many different books on parenting. The plan was to meet at 4:00 for a leisurely dinner and then merrily waltz into the theater before curtain time smiling, happy, relaxed, practically skipping and oozing with love and good memories. The reality was that we barely made the show on time and we were certainly less than merry.

The Daily News described it as the sixth largest snowstorm in New York history which “buried the streets in four-foot drifts, brought transit to a halt and spread a strange and wonderful hush over the city.” Days after the Blizzard of 2010, where 18 to 24 inches of snow accumulated across the tiny island of Manhattan, was the day I decided to create memories. I guess I chose this day for the same unknown reason I would, as a little girl, only wear turtlenecks in winter. From the front seat of my mini van, I threw packets of stale nuts and lollipops at my whining, hungry children. My youngest daughter, then 6 years old, cried “mommy, I’m scared!” as I held down my horn screaming obscenities at the car and traffic guard in front of me. We ran into the theater, out of breath, cranky and hungry with four bagels and cream cheese smuggled in my bag from the deli next door.

I guess I had created a memory. Not the loving one that formed in my mind, but the crazy, hectic one that backfires whenever I put the expectation of perfect in front of me. This winter break I have made no grand plans. In fact, I may not even leave the house. I will try to take what comes with gratitude and appreciation for the moment while baking a dessert I have already tried.

Brownies from The Longevity Kitchen by Rebecca Katz

Ingredients:
1/3 cup almond flour, homemade or store-bought (I used Trader Joe’s almond meal)
1/3 cup brown rice flour (for brownies that are more fudgy, replace the rice flour with another 1/3 cup of almond flour – this was what I did)
2 tablespoons natural unsweetened cocoa powder (I used raw cacao powder)
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/8 teaspoon sea salt
8 ounces dark chocolate (68 to 72% cacao content), chopped
1/3 cup extra-virgin olive oil

2 organic eggs
1/3 cup Grade B maple syrup

1/3 cup maple sugar
 (or light brown sugar)
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 cup coarsely chopped walnuts (I left these out because my children insisted)

Directions:
Preheat the oven to 350°F. Line an 8-inch square baking pan with two pieces of foil long enough to overlap on all four sides. Lightly oil the foil. (I just oiled my brownie pan and put the batter in)
Put the almond flour, brown rice flour, cocoa powder, cinnamon, baking soda, and salt in a bowl and stir with a whisk to combine.
Put half of the chocolate in a heatproof bowl and set the bowl over a saucepan of simmering water. Heat, stirring often, just until the chocolate is melted and smooth. (I melted my chocolate in the microwave) Remove from the heat and whisk in the olive oil.
Crack the eggs into a large bowl and whisk until frothy. Slowly add the maple syrup and maple sugar, whisking all the while, and continue whisking until the mixture is smooth. Add the vanilla extract, then gradually add the chocolate, whisking vigorously all the while, and continue whisking until smooth and glossy.
Add the flour mixture and beat for about 1 minute. Stir in the remaining chocolate and the walnuts. Scrape the mixture into the prepared pan and smooth the top with a spatula.
Bake for 30 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.
Let cool to room temperature in the pan, then cover and refrigerate for at least
 one hour before cutting into brownies. (Of course, I skipped the refrigeration part and the brownies did crumble, but they were still delicious!)

Wishing all safe, imperfect, happy holidays filled with joy and appreciation,
Adina Kelman
Holistic Health Coach
www.alifeinbalance.co

Continuing to Make the Pancakes

A side note to those who read Time to Make the Pancakes:

My kids like their basic needs catered to…quickly. When they’re hungry and the beast within is not tamed quickly, they get extremely irritable. And they don’t seem to be growing out of this phase as quickly as I had hoped. I guess the morning when they were all sitting around the breakfast table waiting to be fed was not the most optimal time to experiment. Then again, I seem not to learn my lessons as swiftly as I should, and so, I ventured forward in the face of very evident danger.

I tried experimenting this weekend with a “flour” base that consisted of 1 cup coconut flour and 1 cup cashew meal. Do NOT try this at home. They were awful. The pancake didn’t hold together and my husband and oldest daughter said that they tasted like marzipan. I had to add sprouted whole wheat flour to prevent them from falling apart, no longer rendering them grain or gluten free, but at least, edible. Supposedly, you can substitute almond and cashew meal for half the amount of a conventional flour. And coconut flour can take the place of a quarter to the entire amount of regular four. That’s a pretty large margin for error and I think, along with maybe too much almond milk, the cause of my cooking catastrophe. Other than my kid’s complaints, I did need to suffer through my husband’s “look how much of these expensive health food ingredients just went into the trash” speech. That alone would have been bearable, but when my husband added the “did you read any instructions” part of the lecture, I got a little cranky. All in all, not the most pleasant baking experience, but, to my husband and children, all I have to say is Lighten up! It’s only pancakes!